Thursday, May 24, 2007
seeing red.
terrible way to end a great day.
it should have been RED.
Sunday, May 20, 2007
people.
alright,
shall stop by for a quick update 'cause i havent been blogging for quite a long time.
ARISTAL's coming, can't wait.
holidays are here, woohoo.
and most importantly i've moved on.
it's quite funny how so many things can happen over a short period of time,
and it affects not only me but people all around me.
i'm so shocked by the intensity and seriousness of it i can't comment on anything.
it shall be solved soon, i hope, without any disastrous outcome.
"Yesterday I died, tomorrow's bleeding
Fall into your sunlight
The future's open wide beyond believing
To know why hope dies
Losing what was found, a world so hollow
Suspended in a compromise
The silence of this sound is soon to follow
Somehow sundown
And finding answers is forgetting all of the questions we call home
Passing the graves of the unknown
Reason clouds my eyes, with splendor fading
Illusions of the sunlight
A reflection of a lie will keep me waiting
With love gone for so long
And this day's ending is the proof of time killing all the faith I know
Knowing that faith is all that I hold
Yesterday I died, tomorrow's bleeding
Fall into your sunlight"
Friday, May 11, 2007
human
Can you tell me how we got in this situation?
I can’t seem to get you off my mind
All these ups and downs
They trip up our good intentions
Nobody said this was easy, right?
After all, we’re only human
Always fighting what we’re feeling
Hurting, instead of healing
After all, we’re only human
Is there any other reason why we
Stay instead of leaving, after all?
Can we get back to the point of this conversation
When we saw things through each other’s eyes
‘Cause now all I see is ruin and devastation
Well, it’s someplace we can hide inside
I’m smart enough to know that life goes by
And it leaves a trail of broken bones behind
If you feel I’m letting go, just give me time
I’ll come running to your side
Can you tell me how we got in this situation?
I can’t seem to get you off my mind
‘Cause after all, we’re only human
Always fighting what we’re feeling
Hurting, instead of healing
After all, we’re only human
Is there any other reason why we
Stay instead of leaving, after all?
Wednesday, May 09, 2007
alright! 'nuff with the excuses, whether or not blog is screwed up again, i'm still going to post.
yes sorry for taking such a long time to post, mostly because i've been lazy, but still at least i'm making the effort to do so now!
thanks to those who constantly kept my blog alive, i really appreciate it.
it's been a particularly hectic week of dancing, working and THINKING.
i can't even really prioritise which ones goes first.
sorry to those whom i scared that day (FRIDAY), during streetfest practice; didn't really expected myself to lose my head, been kind of impatient that day.
i think it's best that i thank my friends who constantly kept me going, especially ben, zhang, wenhao and ale who always have to keep up with my anger and frustrations.
they must be the most patient people in the world, well at least to me.
and i wonder how i got so injury-prone recently.
just within a few days, i could have broke a bone or lost the ability to permanently dance, however, i've been so damned lucky to escape with no more than some bruises and traumas.
NOW i've fallen ill again, wth man, down with a bad nose and body full of aches.
yesterday i felt like i was made of jelly,
i knew i couldn't go full-out, and i didn't.
but still i couldn't even mark out the steps properly. DAMNIT.
haven't felt like this since who knows when, 'cause i don't even bloody remember.
to all the dancers, thank you for constantly reminding me to drink loads of water and have rest, i've been doing that alot today.
it's hard to view something on another perspective, especially when you know that that thing is true which you want to avoid so much.
but i just had to, in order to get myself out of it such that i won't get mindless thoughts over it again.
i've been particularly frustrated and down over it, which contributes to why i've been a much more short-tempered person than usual.
to keep my mind off it is to avoid the it, yet to think about is just as equally worse.
the best(only) thing i could do was take and accept the truth with full force; and i did just that.
painfully but surely, i came to a self-realisation that sometimes i have to loosen my grip over things i know i cannot control.
as i would like to put the situation in scenarios, it's like i'm lying out in the winter for so long, shivering from the cold without much protection from the bitterness, and i can't do anything about it, yet there's someone who would constantly just check whether i'm dead already or not and just leaving if i'm not.
but i know i have to accept that if i close my eyes and just don't think about the coldness, i would be okay as there would be someone or something to come by give me shelter.
just exactly how i should also accept that looking into a pair of eyes which seem to avoid the past, i must also bury the past yet not look into the future.
ironic as it sounds, i know i'll be okay, but i'm not being optimistic either.
g'day to all.
seeya soon.
Can you please, remind me how you feel?
This emptiness is real, I can't bear the thought of it.
and please, remind me how to smile, I lost track after awhile.
Is happiness so hard to get?
I didn't know, that time could move so slow,
when you've got nowhere to go, the silence is so deafening.
Waking up, on the wrong side of your mind.
How could I have been so blind, to see I'm losing everything?